SOUTHERN UNITED STATES – An unnamed kingdom is shocked and saddened to learn that an otherwise well-respected knight has ties to white supremacist organizations. A spokesperson for the kingdom gave The SCAllion the following statement: “Sir Gellir Aslaksson is such a good man. He always has a kind word for everyone, and is so helpful. He’s never been mean to me, and I’m Jewish. Okay, so he had some runic tattoos, but who doesn’t? That doesn’t automatically make one a white supremacist.”
The kingdom’s College of Heralds also made the following statement: “When Sir Gellir submitted his arms, we were, understandably a little concerned, what with the fylfot being so politically charged. But we asked around and no one had a bad word to say about him, so obviously who would think he was a white supremacist?”
Sir Gellir’s affiliation was made apparent after several comments on social media led to uproar. The Crown has asked people to “remember that when they get outraged on social media that there is a person on the other end of the screen that is just doing the best that they can.” The Crown also emphasized to the populace that social media can be incredibly divisive, and at the end of the day, all should just try to get along, regardless of politics.
Sir Gellir’s comments included such delights as “getting rid of those people”, “Jews will not replace us!” and multiple iterations of “I am not a racist, but…”
The Board of Directors, despite being barraged with screenshots and complaints from members who have been personally attacked by the knight, are not seeking revocation and denial of benefits for Sir Gellir at this time, and hopes that banning him from a couple Crown Tournaments will help him learn his lesson. When asked for further comment, the Board ignored our reporters and pretended a request was never received.
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