Fourteenth Century Mafia implicated in drive-by dagging

BARONY OF AYRETON, MIDDLE –  In another Golden Age of Chivalry-themed assault that have been plaguing events since the mid-2000s, one man finds his persona irrevocably altered by what can only be called a “drive-by dagging.”

“I had a perfectly good t-tunic, was at the event, just minding my own business, when bam! I was jumped by five guys in chausses shouting “One True Century!” and now I’m in an Angel-Wing Houppelande!” recounts Lord Reignold de La Pomeraye (formerly Æthelgar, son of Penda of Pferdestadt called Meatbag.) 

People of all different mediocre eras have similar stories to tell. Often waking in the morning to find their utilikilts and pajama pants replaced with cotehardies that leave little to the imagination.

“Look, 20 minutes ago I had no idea what braies were, and now all I know is I hate combat archers,” Lord de La Pomeraye continued before lamenting the lack of the Society Marshallate adopting 360 engagement rules for all combat. “Pray excuse me, good lords, I’m late for an armor as worn tournament.” he said before leaving.

No comment from the 14th Century Mafia was received prior to print. 

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