Avacal · Service

Local Shire Elects Golden Retriever as New Chatelaine

SHIRE OF SIGELHUNDAS – KINGDOM OF AVACAL  In a bold move to advance recruitment, the Shire of Sigelhundas has voted to elect one of the Shire’s dogs,  a 90-lb golden retriever named Rex, as its new Chatelaine. Rex, outfitted with a collar that reads “Bark if you like history!” wagged happily when The SCAllion interviewed his owner, Lady Edith Milner, who is also the Shire’s Chronicler. “Everybody loves Rex,” she explained. “When Rex comes with me to rapier practice in the park, people stop, pet him, and then start asking questions. He is enthusiastic to meet everyone, including children holding ice cream.”  Rex’s interview with The SCAllion was cut short as the golden retriever abruptly left to attempt to recruit two squirrels, a disinterested cat, and a raccoon who expressed interest in helping with the feast.

Lord Benedict de Castellione, the Shire’s Seneschal, denied that the election of the shire’s goodest boi was an attempt to fill a required position in order to keep their standing as a shire. “What? Oh no! We have plenty of volunteers here. This is a serious attempt to make newcomers feel welcome.”

Rex’s recruitment efforts, leaving pee mail on the rhododendrons and the jack pines, appears to be working. Two chihuahuas and a husky have barked that they intend to come to next week’s practice.

Although The SCAllion is not the serious journalism site We Rate Dogs, we would give Rex 14/10, a perfect score.

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