BARONY OF BODLINGTONE, KINGDOM OF BODLANDIA – Faced with growing criticisms of their their lack of transparency and failure to act on populace issues in a timely manner, the Board of Directors today released a statement revealing that they’ve been working on new measures to ignore and dismiss member concerns more rapidly and definitively.
“The members look to us for answers,” the Board of Directors’ statement reads. “And while our members don’t deserve responses to their concerns, we’ve heard loud and clear that they feel they at least should be ignored and dismissed more quickly.”
The SCAllion requested a copy of the action plan referenced by the statement, and was told that it was a confidential document and not subject to document requests. We were assured that the plan contained several steps that the Board would rapidly implement in order to more rapidly dispose of membership feedback.
In a related story, the Board has updated their communications strategy, and all emails, phone calls, and Board Meetings now begin and end with the phrase “The contents of this communication are confidential and not to be shared beyond the BoD and Society Officers.” When asked for comment, Board member Duchess Merione Ferquair of Melby said “There’s nothing nefarious here. Some people open with hello, some people greet each other with ‘this is a confidential communication.’ This is a confidential communication, by the way.”
UPDATE – The SCAllion has received a leaked copy of the Board’s action plan to ignore and dismiss member concerns, and can confirm that the only action item is to issue a release stating that they have been working on new measures to improve in this area.